The Midyear Check-In: What Needs Your Attention?

Episode 51 with Jill Griffin & Molly Bierman

In this episode of No Permission Necessary, Jill and Molly use a wellness wheel to pause and honestly check in on the different areas of life that can affect overall wellbeing.

They explore recreation, social connection, environment, physical health, emotional wellbeing, mindset, and spirituality, discussing where they feel grounded and where they may need more attention. The conversation highlights how high-functioning people can appear to be doing well while certain areas of life quietly become depleted.

This episode is a practical reminder to slow down, look honestly at what needs care, and course-correct before burnout becomes the signal.

• TRANSCRIPTION

  Jill Griffin (00:00)

  All right, so

  Molly Bierman (00:00)

  Jill, you have the floor. What

  are we talking about today? What are we getting into? Guys, it's exciting times here. We're coming to the we're coming up on the year anniversary of the pod. And we are still going, consistent, thriving, enjoying ⁓ the company of you all. And so Jill's got a nice episode packed in for us today.

  Jill Griffin (00:21)

  Yeah, I I found myself all last week. I had I'm I wouldn't consider myself an anxious person leading up to the race. I had this low-level anxiety, just buzz all week. But what came out of that is this episode of

  Of, okay, it's June. We are at the midway point. Where do we want to be in December? Because I feel like December is the time I start slowing down. I start looking back on the year. What have I done? What have I, you know, everyone has New Year's resolutions. I don't really love those. I like reviewing. I love a goal, but to me, it's like this is the halfway point of like, how do we want to finish out the year? And so I

  Molly Bierman (01:03)

  for this.

  Let's go. This is really good. This is really, really good.

  Jill Griffin (01:04)

  Yeah, let's go. Because maybe we

  need some things that we need to course correct. So I sent Molly a wellness wheel. And if you are not part of our newsletter yet, you should be because you know what? I'm gonna send this out in the newsletter. So in the show notes, in the show notes, just drop your email into that link and you will start getting our newsletter every week that's packed full of stuff. Today's going out.

  Molly Bierman (01:19)

  There we go. Everybody

  Jill Griffin (01:31)

  It's a good one.

  But anyway.

  Molly Bierman (01:41)

  And if you're confused

  about what Jill means regarding the show notes, I will say just DM us. You know, you don't need to DM us. It's very easy. Everybody knows what that language is. Drop us your email. Our social team will make sure you get the newsletter.

  Jill Griffin (01:47)

  Yeah.

  Very

  So basically there are seven elements and we're gonna go through each one. It is a scale from one to ten of like where are you at with this? How fulfilled do you feel you are in this area of your life? How well do you think you're doing? and we're gonna go through each one. You start where you want.

  Molly Bierman (02:11)

  recreational. I recreational hobbies fun downtime. I really feel like and this is my perception, okay? And we are not here for anyone else's opinion. My perception is that I am a 9 right now

  Jill Griffin (02:13)

  Recreational.

  Molly Bierman (02:30)

  Okay. And the reason why I'm a nine, okay, ten being the greatest, one being the least, ten that were dialed in, one that were totally on Mars, is that I am dancing. I made a commitment to get back in the dance studio and I've been doing it consistently for six months. So my recreational score is ranking a bit higher right now. I

  I am integrating parts of the downtime and really enjoying them. That's something new, but we're just talking present right now. I'm at an I'm at a nine. Okay? That could today, that could change. But just for today, I am at a nine. ⁓ at this, I would say season of life, right? So season for me last couple months. And I

  Jill Griffin (03:00)

  Today. Just for today.

  Molly Bierman (03:13)

  feel like I'm also in my recreational playtime with my kids. And I'm also in some recreational playtime with my job. So I feel overall, yeah, I feel like we're coming in at a nine, guys. We're coming in at a nine.

  Jill Griffin (03:29)

  I think that the fun and recreation started with a Beyonce concert last year. In the rain.

  Molly Bierman (03:33)

  True. I mean, we've been to a lot

  of concerts since then. And just so you know, guys, I don't know why we were faked out because a Beyonce album should have dropped a week ago. Okay, on the 29th.

  Jill Griffin (03:43)

  I thought I thought

  we were having a new concert.

  Molly Bierman (03:46)

  We're waiting.

  Jill Griffin (03:46)

  We're going.

  We're going when it comes. So I just my my recreational score is a nine. And to commemorate what that looks like for me, I told Molly in one of my inventories this week that we are doing spontaneous summer. What is spontaneous summer, you might ask? Well, spontaneous summer is

  Molly Bierman (03:48)

  rec your recreational score is probably ranking fairly high?

  It sounds like

  you're it sounds like you're going I don't know. I mean it sounds like an old life. It sounds like an old chapter s when you said spontaneous summer. When you wrote that down, I was sitting there being like, Okay, does this involve solo excursions? Are we in a group setting? Where are we? Okay.

  Jill Griffin (04:09)

  Ha ha ha.

  Yeah.

  It might. It might.

  I mean, spontaneous summer is finding things that I've maybe never done before and saying yes to things that we want to do, whether it's my family, whether it's me. It's saying yes, because here's how I operate typically. If it's a weeknight, it's a no. If it's late past nine, probably a no. If it's farther than an hour away,

  Even 45 minutes, probably a no. So like I feel like I've just put these boundaries because it's comfy at my house and I wanna like stay in my routine, but also, you know, spontaneous summer. So I'm actually

  Molly Bierman (05:00)

  Spontaneous summer. You know

  what? Do you know what spontaneous summer looks like tonight? Tonight. Spontaneous Summer is one of my girlfriends who her cousin's in town, who's a good time. Not married, no kids. Okay, so she also is available, okay, for those that may be looking. ⁓ happy to set you guys up on a blind date. But she

  Jill Griffin (05:05)

  Tonight.

  We love that for her.

  Molly Bierman (05:21)

  she wants to go out tonight because she's visiting and but like going out is like rooftop, sunset, dress with heels, the whole bit.

  Jill Griffin (05:32)

  Listen, when you're a mom with kids, going out with a single friend, not even on the prowl, just like someone who they can be up to whenever they want. They're not answering to nobody. It's a different vibe. Okay. And I'm not saying a reckless vibe, but I'm saying it reminds you of who you used to be in a way that is needed sometimes. Once, maybe twice a year. Okay. Other than that, it's way too late and past our bedtimes.

  Molly Bierman (05:56)

  I'm gonna I mean, don't get me wrong, we're

  leaving at 6.15, okay? We're catching the sunset, okay? We're catching the sunset. We're leaving at 6.15, dinner at 645, hang for a couple hours. I mean, I'm a designated driver. I'm a I'm a DD in this situation, so let's see what happens.

  Jill Griffin (06:07)

  That sounds perfect.

  Yeah.

  So yeah, spontaneous summer. We're traveling internationally with the kids, which I've done before, but we're going across the pond this time. So that will be a first. I just feel like fun is the point. If you're not having fun, it's a problem. Moving on to the next one. All right, we're just gonna go clockwise. Social, feeling connected to others.

  Molly Bierman (06:24)

  Mm-hmm.

  Jill Griffin (06:33)

  This is one of my lower ones, to be honest with you, which I think is a little bit I've been going through this thing lately.

  Molly Bierman (06:35)

  Interesting.

  Okay, you go first. Go first.

  What's your number? Let's start with number. Tangible here. Wha I'm offended. I mean, and this isn't my for my opinion, but go ahead. What's the T here?

  Jill Griffin (06:43)

  Four. It's a four.

  Molly made this about her. We're on the second one.

  Molly Bierman (06:55)

  ⁓

  Jill Griffin (06:58)

  I guess I've just been reevaluating like connection has just come up a lot. And it and I think part of it is this comparison. Like comparison's the thief of joy, right? Where it's like, I look at some people who have this ease at which they connect with others. Now, do I think that's always like authentic? Maybe not. I struggle with that.

  I struggle with, and this is where it comes down to like being judgmental. Number one. And number two, I kind of just feel like I've been in a year. We've talked about this in different episodes. Like this year has really been a lot of lessons of like, who am I exchanging my energy with that matches my energy? I'm in this place where like I want to be connecting with people.

  Molly Bierman (07:27)

  Okay.

  Jill Griffin (07:42)

  Not just like, especially with like my fitness. Let's just use that as an example. People who are of a similar mindset with this, right? I want to connect with people. But it's like meeting new friends. And when you're older, that's like weird and like hard. And

  Molly Bierman (07:54)

  Yeah, okay. Yeah.

  Jill Griffin (07:58)

  So I'm like in this stage where I'm like connecting with new people and like feeling out is this authentic? Is this something I want to explore? Can they match and be reciprocal with me? Because that's really important at this stage right now. Like I can't I give to so many people that are not supposed to be reciprocal. So like I can't in a friendship not have that. Does that make sense? Yeah.

  Molly Bierman (08:20)

  Yes, absolutely.

  I feel

  for social, I also feel like I'm ranking high. I I really feel like I'm probably ranking at about an eight.

  In social. And the reason being is that probably for about five years while I was owned and operated the impatient unit, my world was really pretty small. I mean, it was during COVID, I was having babies, I was going through maternity leaves, pregnancy, all the changes. And so during that time, I think I really got kind of tight with where I needed support and what felt reciprocal. And now I'm kind of in a season of a little bit more expansiveness where not every single

  Relationship

  has to be reciprocal, but it does have to be fun, you know? Like I'm kind of in this place of yeah. Yeah. Yes. Right. Yeah, I really enjoy, you know, like tonight, like an impromptu out with girlfriends fun. And there's also people in my life that that

  Jill Griffin (09:03)

  Yeah, there has to I I have to be getting something out of this that like makes sense because I don't only have so much time. Maybe that's what it is.

  Molly Bierman (09:22)

  happens much more regularly or in a in a much different way. So yes, I agree that ⁓ my time is limited. So I kind of look at it through fun, through, you know, vulnerable sharing, authenticity, kind of all the different things. ⁓ but yeah, I feel like my social

  I I mean ⁓ I'm to give you guys context, just for like just for everyone to realize like who I am at my core, and I was actually sharing this with someone, one of my clients yesterday, is that pretty much at age five, like I was the one coordinating neighborhood events, talent shows.

  restaurant reservations, like t d I have always been the person that is going to be in some level of social setting. What I will say though is that that is tempered and I'm now finding like my balance and stride in it. But that is my comfort level to kind of be and planning and having connection in time with people.Feels comfy for me.

  Jill Griffin (10:18)

  I can identify with that.

  All right, environment, safe and comfortable living space.

  Molly Bierman (10:24)

  I can't complain about that in any sense of the word.

  Jill Griffin (10:27)

  No, you can't. I

  mean, I can't either. I'm at a six. ⁓ there's some

  I think just because there's just some decor like decorative stuff that I wanna do that I've been trying to focus a little bit more on. ⁓ but like safe and comfortable for sure. ⁓

  Molly Bierman (10:39)

  That's true. That's true. That's true.

  Ideal.

  Jill Griffin (10:47)

  But I think

  it's more I think it's more of the like aesthetic piece of like and there's some things that I've been putting on the on the back burner. Now that spring sports are coming to like a halt soon, we can get into some of that.

  Molly Bierman (11:00)

  I've really been ⁓ in my element of starting to explore areas of the house that really do need tending to like artwork on the walls. Like we moved into our house some years ago and it kind of felt overwhelming because we did it all. It's, you know, we did a bunch of things, moved in, and then it was like you didn't want to touch anything. It was just too much, too overwhelming, too hard to pick out one more thing, So we kind of did nothing.

  And ⁓ slowly but surely that's changing. So I would say I'm probably ranking about a six too

  Jill Griffin (11:31)

  Okay. Physical. Exercise, nutrition, quality of sleep.

  Molly Bierman (11:34)

  I'm low. I'm a five.

  And the reason being is my sleep is really good. My nutrition is getting better. And my exercise is still a bit inconsistent in this phase of my life. but I'm also just allowing that to be. Like, yes, do I have goals that I would like to be an Olympic athlete into a HIROX competition like Jill? I mean, I don't know if I really want to do that, but I'd like to be a little bit more consistent than I am. ⁓

  And I'm actually really okay with like the recreational side and that I've gotten back in the dance studio. And to me that might just be where I am in my season. But I still feel like I'm ranking it at five.

  Jill Griffin (12:08)

  I'm at an eight. I feel like I have really good balance. now that this like really tough training block is out of the way, I have like I went back to the chiropractor today. Like, there's some things physically that I need to address, some imbalances that I've just kind of been living with, and I don't wanna just let that be the norm.

  My sleep has been a little bit rough lately, to be honest with you, which is not typical for me. but exercise and nutrition, I mean, I've my next race is five weeks from today. I'm running another high rocks in October. So yeah, we're we're just gonna, yeah, we're I'm thriving physically, I I feel like. Emotionally, taking care of your needs and feelings.

  Molly Bierman (12:43)

  You're top tier. You're top tier.

  Emotionally.

  Jill Griffin (12:54)

  I'm ranking high on this one. I don't know about you. I put myself at an eight. Is that delusional? Why? like I feel like I

  Molly Bierman (12:56)

  What are you ranking?

  Probably.

  Jill Griffin (13:06)

  I am somebody who has to process my emotions like with other people. Like I I do some introspection, I do my journaling, but I really am somebody who I just need to purge those feelings, get some mirror back of like, is this valid? Is this Dululu? Like, where are we at on the on the scale? And where's my part? And then we move forward. some things, I mean.

  Molly Bierman (13:12)

  True.

  Jill Griffin (13:31)

  I'm not gonna say what the specific things are, but if we look back over the last two years, there were some things that like I got really stuck on. Like emotional wise. Like there were some resentments and some like things that like I just kept going back to. And I think when I did this wheel this morning, it's like, you know what? Like I haven't had that in a while. Have I gotten like annoyed at people? Sure. But it's like a day or two and we're done. Like I don't have time for this. And not in like a

  Molly Bierman (13:42)

  Same, same, yeah.

  Well, we're also

  Jill Griffin (13:57)

  Denial way, just more of like, I'm good. Like that's not me that's not for me to kind of focus on.

  Molly Bierman (14:03)

  I think it goes into our last episode too of like writing things out, talking it out, doing inventory. You know, we've talked about this infinite times on this on this podcast, like harboring resentment is the number one offender for people who have had histories of addiction or mental health issues because it really be cre creates you as the victim versus your accountability to the situation. And so for emotional, I would say I'm probably

  Jill Griffin (14:25)

  Yeah.

  Molly Bierman (14:29)

  ranking at a six, like I'm still struggling at times to take accountability for areas that feel hard. ⁓ I think that is more of a struggle in your intimate relationships. I think it's more of a struggle in maybe your work relationships, the things that get consume a lot of time.

  But I will say that like I'm the first to reflect on it and have people in my life that can tell me the hard truth. So nurturing it, yes. Without the infrastructure and support, I'm a I'm a dead woman walking, you know? Like I really do need a lot of accountability in a l a village, as they say. but I would say I'm, yeah, I'm ranking at a six to seven, like slowly starting to lean in and like observe what's going on.

  Jill Griffin (15:09)

  Yeah. when we talk about this is like a course correction, it's like, okay, it's just highlighting what are some areas like how do we bring ourselves back into the balance we want? Like sometimes we're way out of whack.

  Whether it's a two or a ten, I think at certain parts of our lives, like you said earlier, we accept that's like, yeah, I'm not exercising as much, but like that's okay for me right now because of everything else. Like you have to this allows us to kind of like pull back and look at the big picture, not just like otherwise we get really hypercritical, I think, of, I'm not doing enough. It's like, yeah, but I'm tending to my emotions at this phase of my life, that takes different types of energy and and attention.

  Molly Bierman (15:30)

  Totally.

  Yeah.

  Jill Griffin (15:47)

  mental strong and healthy mindset.

  Molly Bierman (15:49)

  feel pretty high. I mean I would say an eight point five, except when I am

  not tending to the other areas. Like I really am a big believer that what you put out into the world you get back. You know, I at times can be really disturbed and really frustrated with some people who maybe use and abuse the behavioral health system in a way that feels grimy or feels crappy or feels just icky as a whole. And I was talking with one of my

  close colleagues and friends around how to stay kind of mentally fit in an industry, in any industry that can sometimes feel like you are on are on shaky turf, right? That there's people around you that maybe are contributing,

  to their own needs versus the client's needs, right? So there's all this stuff that kind of circulates. And so what really has helped me stay like mentally strong and kind of in a healthy mindset is obviously all the accumulation of the other pieces of the wheel. But more importantly is that

  I have a passion and purpose for what I do on a daily basis. And if I am sacrificing my passion and purpose for my own selfish needs and wants, that is where I'm going to struggle mentally. So if I continue to kind of align how I got here to begin with, right? Which was a desire to see where I can make an impact and help more people, that to me kind of increases my my my mindset where

  Jill Griffin (17:12)

  I ranked myself a ten out of ten here. No room for improvement.

  Molly Bierman (17:18)

  If anyone knows me and

  anyone has me, with me, has ever done a performance plan, has ever been supervised by me to have a performance plan, you know we don't give tens. You know we don't give tens. We don't, we don't give tens.

  Jill Griffin (17:27)

  This isn't an employee performance. This isn't an employee performance plan. I don't,

  I honestly I put myself at 10 because I don't know what I could be doing differently. Like, and I think this got pointed out to me earlier, where like last week when people were talking about, ⁓ like these are the things that must be coming up for you going into this race. And I was like, No, like I'm just.

  That's not actually coming up. Like, I don't have a fear of what other people are gonna think. I don't have a fear of failing. I know I'm prepared for this. Like, was I nervous? Yes. But I also think like, just like my daughter calls it, exervice. Like excitement and nervous feel the same in our bodies. Like it's it feels like it feels like anxiety, right? So like, but I knew I studied for the test. I prepared. Like I was good. I have a very balanced self-talk. I I just kind of I always

  Molly Bierman (18:05)

  I like that.

  Mm-hmm.

  Jill Griffin (18:17)

  I always have had that to some extent. I think that's been strengthened over time and recovery for sure, just because, you know, to have self-esteem, you have to do esteemable acts, right? That was something that was always taught to me. And the 10 out of 10 doesn't mean that I don't have some some moments where I have doubts or fears or whatever, but I don't stay in that very long. So I don't know what I could be doing differently improve.

  Molly Bierman (18:40)

  We love

  that. We love that. We'll find something on the next episode.

  Jill Griffin (18:43)

  We will say

  that on the spiritual basis, so I interpreted spiritual. I didn't read the the fine print where it says personal growth and sense of purpose, because I don't necessarily, I don't know, that's not how I relate to spirituality. ⁓ spirituality for me is my relationship with my higher power. That's and and just the universe, God, nature, the the mysteries of the world, whatever.

  Molly Bierman (18:55)

  Yeah, that doesn't connect. Sure.

  Jill Griffin (19:07)

  I honestly, this was a four for me. And so going back to connection, yeah, I'm meeting next week with one of my friends who, she's super spiritual. She's just in like kind of like a woo woo way, but also connected to God. Like we just have these conversations. She's also a therapist and ⁓

  Molly Bierman (19:11)

  Wow.

  Jill Griffin (19:25)

  It'll be good to meet and have coffee or lunch with her next week because the last time I really sat down and spoke with her, she was like, you know, you're somebody who really needs to be quiet with God. Like that's to have a connection. Like you you kind of require that alone time, that quiet time, which I do have, but I haven't been as intentional about it. I haven't been journaling as much, have not been meditating as much.

  I don't really feel the consequences of that yet in certain ways, but I think in terms of how that and my connection piece, like the social piece, are l both low, I'm assuming that's probably why.

  Molly Bierman (19:58)

  So I would say that for spirituality I probably kind of always hover between

  Like a five and a seven. Like I never feel, I never feel fully like I I think it's a lot of comparison too. Like how connected do I feel? How aligned do I feel? So it's not that I don't feel like there's something greater than me, and I do connect with that in a in a variety of ways, but I wouldn't say there's these like

  white light moments as much anymore, you know? So I also think we do things to excess naturally. So if we're not feeling like completely like we're basically floating, ⁓ at least for me, then I'm always like criticizing like how well am I doing that area of my life, right? How well do I feel connected? so yeah, I would say I'm probably ranking around a five and that I could, I'm doing the bare minimum.

  Jill Griffin (20:38)

  Yeah.

  Molly Bierman (20:46)

  I'm not doing I'm not doing more than the minimum at this current

  Jill Griffin (20:49)

  doing the minimum right now. Let let's just put it that way. I'm below I'm below average. let's hope that my spirituality can really get a boost at my massage later today because I feel like that's gonna be a spiritual moment.

  Molly Bierman (20:52)

  Okay. We're

  I think that this is a really well, firstly, the the purpose of the exercise is to slow us down, to really acknowledge all of the you know domains that we live in, and that we can be really high-functioning in some areas and really kind of low in others, but still be able to walk through life with a general sense of ease. so we'd love to hear from you guys. We'd love to hear where you scored yourself, where you ranked yourself, give us feedback, tell us kind of what's going on in your world. And as we continue to ramp.

  up to our reset and our celebration of our one-year anniversary of the pod. There'll be more ⁓ more insights to come. As a reminder, please sign up for our newsletter. And until next time, remember to walk with no permission necessary.

  Jill Griffin (21:42)

  Yeah, we'll see you next week.